Do you love Juicy?

Juicelog Tues 310106: Received several e-mails from my mates telling me how much people will be loving Juicy. I’m thinking I am due some copyright monies. DJ Fidel has already got me down on the opening night guestlist.

Juiceless throat

Juicelog Mon 300106: Woke up from my 12 hour sleep with a sore throat and could hardly speak. Now I know what you're thinking boys, but no I didn’t overdo it with too much karaoke singing. It was due to being too eager on Sunday morning consuming GBL without diluting it properly.

My friend Matt B. who has recently relocated to Bristol has finally joined the world of text messaging and finally got himself a mobile phone. Not sure why after all this time after having relocated to Bristol he has decided he now needs a mobile.

Had another run in with madmary today at work when she walked straight into my office without knocking. This time I didn’t stand for any of her nonsense and kicked her out of my office. Am going to make it my petty 2006 objective to ensure that she knocks and then waits at my door.

Juicy celebrates Chinese New Year

Juicelog Sun 290106: Dan tricked me by advising me to wear my white shorts to Beyonce without wearing any undies. Now I ain’t your average undies wearing kinda guy but I did bring a pair just in case I needed them. Had to fend off clubbers as well as some of da posse trying to pull my shorts down. The shorts attracted way too much attention even for the likes of attention seeking moi.

Whilst we were queuing to get into Later I found out my cyber privacy had been violated. The dynamic duo had craftily hacked into one of my accounts – will get those two back at a later stage.

Pre-Kung Hay Fat Choi

Juicelog Sat 280106: Aaaargh my PC has died on me. Am now waiting for my brother to fix it and to let me know how much data I might have lost.

Paedo pop round this afternoon to pickup a laptop from my flat. It was the first time he has been to my flat. It turned this tasteless queen actually liked my place and also my red coffee table. Not sure if that is a good sign or not.

Julian and Ruben threw a Chinese new year house party. It was a good occasion for us lot to celebrate the year of the bitch. Was amazed to find out that Ruben in their new stunning house in SW9 didn't have a steamer but they came up with a genius improvised solution. David M. decorated their loft styled house with various pictures of dogs stuck onto a piece of red paper roll which went all the way round the bottom floor. My taste buds were treated to dim sum even though it did feel a bit bizarre eating prawn dumplings in the evening.

A few of the gang (Phu, Dan, Nigel & Brad) decided that they would spontaneously employ their artistic talents by producing a unique and bespoke Miss Fat Choi outfit for me with materials that Alexander McQueen wished he had access to. Found out the hard way why women cannot wear heels for sustained periods of time. It is excruciatingly and unbearably painful. I found this out when my fashion-designers-come-tailors constructed a tiny weeny gap in between my crotch area which meant I had a nightmare journey walking down a colossal flight of stairs.

Qx (again)

My second appearance in Qx. Next stop Boyz.....

Colin's new found status

Juicelog Fri 200106: there are numerous mates & friends of mine who find it hard to believe that I came out of mother’s punani approximately 30 years 4 months ago. But I did, and grew up as a teenager indulging in the acting abilities of the old skool, par example: Tom (not very tall & not very gay) Cruise, Michael (also not very tall) J. Fox, Luke (sexy smile) Perry, etc.

Having not paid much attention to the new breed of Heat^TM wannabes I saw a 13 minute clip of a film that dazzled me straight away. Clearly if there is going to a challenger to Brokeback Mountain at The Oscars this is going to be the magnus opus that will kick those gay cowboy butts. In a few minutes Colin Farrell breathtaking performance left me wondering has a new Hollywood gold standard been set and will this inspire the many struggling and determined waiters-cum-actors out there in LA.

Before you all rush out to your local multiplex trying to book tickets, I’m afraid to say that this will not be on commercial release. Juicylites who are still on my rolodex and have a birthday coming up soon will be receiving a flat 5"x5.5" parcel accompanied with matching Playboy ribbon.

Rare occurrence

Juicelog Thurs 190106: A terrible terrible thing happened today. Whilst I was getting my haircut today by my friendly barber, I heard the loud sound of glass smashing and a woman screaming. My immediate reaction was that a car accident had taken place. It turned out that some little primary school child sadly had a glass object dropped on his head from the height of a first floor flat. Don’t think the child was badly injured but there was a lot of crying and shouting. Without prejudging the situation without full facts I hope the person responsible is fully held accountable for such a wicked act. This got me thinking what are the mathematical probability of this happening to your average streetwalker. If the object dropped was from a far greater height, would the child had survived the impact?

Onto more trivial matters, has anyone managed to pick up this week’s Qx yet?

Brokeback Juicy

Juicelog Wed 180106: Over the past nine days I have been experiencing a slightly tender feeling in the mid section of my back. Is this a downside to being over 30? Have I got a dodgy sofa? Am I sitting incorrectly at my desk at work? Maybe I’m growing Siamese twins somewhere around my posterior??!! Somebody get me a chiropractor quick (preferably before Valentines day)….

Zero here I come

Juicelog Tues 170106: Have decided to take a break from clubs with no air con (i.e. gay clubs). This isn’t through choice but because my bank balance is shockingly only showing two digits. Not that I am the materialistic type but considering I have holiday plans but I think I am going to have to give Aunt Sally’s leaving do this weekend a miss.

Seeing red?

Juicelog Mon 160106: During the weekend I finally got round to painting my coffee table in a glossy red colour. The tin describes it as classic red but I reckon it looks more like a lipstick red. Am going to trial it out for a few weeks before deciding to go with a safe glossy black. Do you folks reckon it is too bright?

More thirtyness

Juicelog Sat 140106: Alex & Christie both decided to celebrate their 30th birthdays by hiring out the International Bar. The birthday girls dropped out whilst a few us decided to extend the evening on their behalf. Tonight’s undisputed winner of the gurning competition was Ashley. It was a classic look that not even Mister potatohead could have pulled off.

we like slurdays..

Juicelog Thurs 120106: January can only mean one thing: sales, shopping, queues and happy hour all month. Boy, did we (Paedo, Stew, pervy John plus a few other non-entities) knock back the booze tonight. Inside Barcode I started playing a silly game of flirty texting with fit Michael B. It was silly because we were stood about 2 metres away from each other, I was with my posse and he was with his crew.

The evening got stretched until it grew into a Discotec and then blossomed into Gravity. Paedo did his usual trick of re-igniting his previous lust with a very sweet (and sensible) Scottish guy by the name of Ken. Got bored of their Tina & Ike antics. Just in case you’re wondering the flirty texting paid off for me.

Bye Nick Nick

Juicelog Sat 070106: Had a sad moment tonight when we waved goodbye to Nick Nick. The youngest looking member in Big Britain will be heading down to Sydney to fulfill his life long ambition as a kangaroo master chef. Actually he’s not but he will be gone for quite some time. Most of the cocktails served in Meza differed from the usual selection. Chose a Jazzy Tini as it sounded kinda like a juicy type of cocktail. It definitely was not juicylicious.
Nick Nick got very plastered which meant no proper disco’ing for us tonight. This didn’t stop us from constructing our own very gay corner and bopped away regardless of the diners around us.