Staying alive

Juicelog Fri 100306: Being more plant conscious was one of my mini goals this year. Not letting any of my five plants die would be considered a major success. Last year I woefully lost a medium sized money plant which is the main reason why my local Social Services department won’t allow me to adopt any kids.

The difficultly with my plants is that I have the types that require sunlight in order to stay alive. As a nocturnal person who tends to bed it late in the evening and therefore rarely ever waking up when the cock crows. Some of my friends tell me I am edging towards an asshole existence - what I think they are hinting at is that I need to discard my where-the-sun-don’t-shine lifestyle. To get round this problem I've now incorporated an obsessive daily routine of pulling up my blinds just before I go to bed. Now that I’m ready to proceed to the next level, anyone wanna lend me their Loving and Looking After Your Husband handbook?